Would you tell your best friend that her boyfriend is a douche canoe?

So I dragged the new man all the way to Fort Beaufort this weekend to show him off to my high school best friend and her husband. I seem to be doing this a bit lately which is a bit of a weird thing for me. I kind of have this uncontrollable desire to parade the man around going “ooh look what I found!” – which is certifiable and not normal behaviour. I certainly never felt this particularly un-humble need for shameless bragging before.

Anyway, the first thing she tells me is that she thinks he is really nice and she is so relieved because she never liked my ex, and she only pretended that she did in order to be supportive. She then assures me that she does genuinely like my new man and is not merely being supportive of another one of my strays.

Fair enough…

But why exactly do we do this? And do we all do it?  And how genuine are such statements really? Do we all look at our loved ones’ new significant others and think “My God what the hell!” while smiling fondly as if nothing is wrong?

Every single one of my friends has told me that they were either indifferent to or actively disliked my ex while we were dating – and yet none of them ever said a single thing about it until after he left.

If your best friend was dating a douche canoe, would you tell her?

And…most importantly…what is a douche canoe?

Comments (4)

AngelOctober 7th, 2009 at 11:00 am

Its such a touchy subject… I mean, if I were really worried about my friend then maybe I would consider saying something to her… but so often its the messenger who gets shafted.

NayesOctober 7th, 2009 at 11:10 am

Yeah well that’s TOTALLY the problem. I’m completely ok with her thinking he’s a tool now but can you imagine how I would have taken the news while I was five months pregnant?

SallyOctober 11th, 2009 at 9:53 pm

my friend only told me after my separation from my husband that she never liked him and she wished she had said something earlier. Would I have listened I have no idea. It is a really really hard one.

bladeNovember 2nd, 2009 at 10:00 pm

a case by case approach to this kinda thing would be best.
in general, there is no right or wrong answer here

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